12/4/2016 0 Comments Final ActIt’s been about two weeks since my last update. Not much has happened to report on. Thanksgiving was hard. I’m glad we didn’t go anywhere. A few holidays ago I remember being so excited for the next year’s event. I kept thinking, “This is our last *insert holiday here* without a baby. Next year will be so different.” Last year, I had the same thoughts. Except last year, I was certain it was our last holiday season as non-parents. This year, I keep thinking that this is it. This is how all of our holidays could potentially be. I used to fantasize about what kinds of family traditions we would create with our own family. Now I wonder if we can just figure out a way to never acknowledge holidays again. All I can do is hope that next year really will be different.
So our next steps is, unfortunately, IVF. Each step of the way I’ve kept some hope that it would not come down to this. But, here we are. It is our only option. The doctor seemed quite optimistic that IVF will work for us if we act fast. Reading through the 60+ page informed consent was overwhelming to say the least. There is a link between ovarian cancer and IVF drugs. Although apparently this is just a correlation and there’s just as strong a correlation between women who experience infertility and have ovarian cancer who don’t do IVF. So basically, I have a high risk of ovarian cancer with or without the IVF drugs. If we are able to successfully conceive and have a live birth, our child is at a higher risk of a disability and/or childhood cancer. Not to mention all the horrible side effects of infertility drugs including Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome (OHSS). This causes your ovaries to enlarge and can be life threatening and is relatively common among women who use IVF drugs. Our clinic does not do IVF in December because of the holidays. I have to wait to start my next period and then call to make an appointment. They will go over more in detail the process and what to expect. But, this is what I know so far. Because it has been 6 months since my last HSG, I have to do something called SIS. This is essentially where they use a saline injection into my uterus to check for any polyps or other abnormalities. They’ll also do a “practice embryo transfer” during this procedure. They’ll stick a catheter into my uterus to map out any weird curves or other unexpected things. We will both have to go in and be tested for infectious diseases (this is actually a law…kind of crazy.) Luckily, since our last IUI was less than 6 months ago, Matt will be spared from having to do another seaman analysis. Once I start my period in January I will begin injections. I won’t know my actual protocol until I have my next appointment, but essentially I’ll be doing injections one to three times a day for two weeks. I’ll have to go in for monitoring several times during these two weeks. When the follicles appear mature they will do an egg retrieval. For this procedure you have to be put under general anesthesia. They go into your ovaries and pull out the eggs from your ovaries with a needle. Then they will put the eggs and sperm into a dish to let the eggs become fertilized. Then we will have to wait 5 days to see how many are good enough to transfer and/or freeze. We are likely going to do a frozen embryo transfer as this somehow increases the likelihood of success by 10%. So that means we will have to wait another cycle to transfer an embryo. Once they transfer the embryo, you still have to wait about 2 weeks to find out if it implanted. And if it implants, you pray and pray and pray you don’t have a miscarriage or stillbirth. So as you can see, this is an extremely long process. So much waiting. So while we wait the doctor has prescribed me with 60mg of a vitamin called CoQ10 three times a day and another supplement called DHEA 25 mg 3 times a day. The nurse warned me that DHEA would cause my skin to be oily which would cause acne and it will likely cause facial hair growth. Lovely. Because already being fat and having hair loss from the other fertility meds doesn’t suck enough. Let’s add facial hair growth. What she did not warn me about was that a couple of hours after taking the DHEA I would have a gastronomical event. Every. Single. Time. Luckily, I was able to discover this on a weekend. Matt and I are also not allowed to have caffeine, alcohol, or moderate (or greater) exercise starting a few days ago. I’m also trying to cut back on carbohydrates and sugar, but one step at a time for my own sanity. So, this is our last act. We are buying a package of two fresh cycles and unlimited frozen cycles. So, if this doesn’t work on the first try, or the second try, we could be traveling down this path for several more months depending on how many embryos we get. If this is ultimately does not work we will be out of options and money. We will have to move away from these last 2+ hellish years and try to figure out what’s next in our lives without children. I know I need to prepare myself for this to not work, but I can’t make the space in my mind that this won’t work. This has to work. It can’t not work. Update on Bonfire campaign: Our T-shirt campaign is going very well! We could not possibly express in words what it means to have so many people share our link, buy a shirt, and/or donate money! We are forever grateful and humbled by your support. It means a lot to know we have such fantastic and caring friends. I thought a $500 goal was lofty, but we reached that goal very quickly without even selling the 35 shirts! Our campaign is still active until December 12th and we have adult and youth size shirts if anyone would like to buy a shirt or make a donation: https://www.bonfire.com/helpfillournest/ We will be using this money to help pay for the anesthesia cost as that cost is not included in the package that we purchased. That $550 charge must be paid for with a check so this money will be perfect for that! The remainder of the money will go towards acupuncture treatments. Acupuncture is $80 per session and I’ll need to go one to two times per week during the treatment. I can’t think of a more fitting quote to end this blog post: “I get by with a little help from my friends.” – The Beatles
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Heather Joyce
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